27. Third Strike

The book:  Requiem (Delirium #3)
The author:  Lauren Oliver
The rating:  2 stars

I've been struggling to write a review for this book, procrastinating in a way that is normally reserved only for term papers and phone calls to relatives, and for a while I couldn't understand why.  I've always enjoyed writing these reviews (it's not as if I'm being paid to tell the Internet my opinions, after all), but for some reason my subconscious seemed to be avoiding writing this review at all costs.  By this point, I've already read another book that needs reviewing, so I've been forced to ret-con this review into existence lest not count Requiem towards my challenge total entirely. But now, struggling to think of something to say about the final, trite book in what I've found to be an entirely trite series, I've realized that the problem is that I simply didn't care one iota about Requiem.

Confession time:  today is actually August 15th, not the 3rd, so I finished this book about two weeks ago, and I still don't have anything to say about it except to rehash everything I've said about Delirium and Pandemonium.  It was boring; nothing stands out two weeks later except for the fact that the ending was positively horrendous.  Utterly unexplored character deaths, arbitrary endpoints, and overall no semblance of closure for pretty much all of the major plot points of the trilogy.  If I was actually emotionally invested in the series, I would probably have been thoroughly disappointed.

And, yeah, that's about it for this review.  If you're thinking 'Wait, what?  This review is over already?  She hasn't even said anything yet!', then congratulations!  That's the exact feeling you'll get when you turn the last page of Requiem.  Now that you've got that experience out of the way, you can leave the Delirium series on the shelf and save yourself a handful of hours of your hard-earned free time.

26. C'est Pareil

The book:  Pandemonium (Delirium #2)

The author:  Lauren Oliver

The rating:  3 stars

I don't know if I'd go so far as to say that Pandemonium was even worse than Delirium, but it certainly wasn't any better.  All the failings of the original were back in full force, coupled with a few new transgressions.

The twists still were dull and predictable, although Oliver does not have Lena figure things out until chapters after it has become blatantly obvious to the reader.  This contributes to Lena's downward spiral into a completely grating, intolerable heroine, although her slowness does not hold a candle to the awful romantic plot of Pandemonium.  I mentioned in my review of Delirium that the Lena/Alex romance was painfully instantaneous—her entire view of the world, morality, and herself is utterly transformed in just a few days with a cute boy?  Really?—but having suspended my incredulity over this unlikely instalove and accepted the fact that Lena and Alex simply had some sort of deep, pure, unfathomable love that seventeen-year-old, never-been-kissed me cannot even begin to contemplate, I found the new romance between Julian and Lena to be completely nonsensical.  It hasn't been years and she is finally healing and moving on—it has been six months, for goodness sake!  Unless Oliver is trying to make a commentary on the shallowness of teenage love (which is doubtful, considering how heavily her novels are leaning on the whole true-love-romance shtick), I cannot comprehend the rationale behind Julian's inclusion in the narrative other than to force our 'completely ordinary' heroine into a love triangle with two incredibly kind, funny, attractive guys.  Oh, how will she ever cope?

My second gripe about the novel is that it seems to have caught the 'overly convenient' bug.  Our heroes are able to guess four-digit, numeric passcodes (twice!) using rather implausible logic; on multiple occasions Lena happens to overhear exactly the piece of information she needs at exactly the right time, like when a guard just happens to mention Julian's hospital while she's eavesdropping.  No mundane, unhelpful chitchat about Joe's new cocker spaniel or how Ann traded Larry for the night shift; the only thing she overhears is exactly what she needs to know.  I understand the need to trim the fat and conserve plot details, but really?  It all oozes of contrived.

I suppose we have time for one final complaint:  Oliver's stock purple prose.  If I have to read one more teen novel where the heroine describes her male love interest as smelling of 'boy,' I am going to puke.  Seriously, was this descriptor in some writing seminar I missed?  Is Chapter ten of Writing Teen Romance for Dummies titled Male Olfactory Attractiveness?  I am finding it just a bit strangely specific.

Despite my general dislike of everything to do with this series, I've already downloaded the trilogy's final installment onto my eReader.  I'm not optimistic enough to chalk Pandemonium up to Middle Novel Syndrome; I'm almost certain that my opinion of this saga won't be saved by reading Requiem, but at least there's something cathartic about a surefire chance to complain. 

25. Tedium

The book:  Delirium (Delirium #1)
The author:  Lauren Oliver
The rating:  3 stars

This book was a dystopia, that's for sure.  An unimaginative, derivative dystopia, whose main 'twist' (love being forbidden) isn't really a twist at all; it's a frequent feature of dystopian literature.  I'd say about half of the dystopian novels I've read also have people paired up in assigned couple units:  The Giver, Matched... even Brave New World's hypersexual society portrays love as something alien and wrong.

Nevertheless, I'm a huge dystopia fan; there are worse things in the genre than cookie-cutter worlds, and so that alone wouldn't ruin the book for me.  However, Oliver does not find redemption on any other front.  The romance between Lena and Alex is one of paper-thin instalove.  Sorry, best-friend-since-childhood, I won't shift my world view one iota based on your pleas.  Oh, hello boy-I-just-met-and-who-I've-been-raised-to-wholeheartedly-believe-is-dangerous, a few days with you and my entire personality has been overhauled!  Secondary characters seem pulled out of cliches:  evil-stepfamily (and, just like in Cinder, the youngest stepsister is the exception);* stone-hearted policemen; so-much-better-than-me best friend (to prove just how 'ordinary' our heroine is)...

The plot twists are equally trite.  Oh, the future dystopian world is enclosed by a fence, outside of which there is no civilization?  I wonder where I've seen that before... (for the benefit of the hypothetical reader who has never, ever read a single dystopian novel in their entire life, the answer to that seemingly-rhetorical question is, of course, everywhere.)  Coupled with the old 'if you don't see the body' law of fiction, nothing Delirium threw at me came as any sort of surprise.

While there is nothing special about Delirium, I don't mean to suggest that it is an entirely terrible novel.  Oliver's prose is rather enjoyable to read, even if her subject matter isn't the most stimulating.  I also found the epigraphs at the start of each chapter to be a nice touch; they allow the reader to become a bit more immersed in the culture of Oliver's world, something that is otherwise too scarcely referenced.

Despite my reservations, I have already picked up the second book in the series, Pandemonium.  Perhaps some of the more problematic areas of Delirium will be rectified in this second installment, although I certainly won't be holding my breath.

*Yes, technically Lena's adopted family are her cousins, not her stepsisters, but the point still stands.